Category Archives: Diriku Pikiranku

Reads my thoughts and ideas about life, love, society, politics, environment, anything that comes to mind, and also my lesson learned through my ups and downs. A little phylosophical, but that wouldn’t hurt right? :)

Euforia Tim Nasional Indonesia

Baru aja nonton acara Metro TV tentang “Nasionalisme 2×45 Menit”. Di situ ada dianalisa tentang Euforia Timnas yang terjadi di Indonesia, pasca turnamen sepakbola AFF Cup 2010. Bagi yang belum tau (red:kemane aje? :P), performa tim sepakbola Indonesia yg mengesankan di AFF Cup 2010 benar-benar membangkitkan nasionalisme bangsa dan popularitas sepakbola Indonesia di mata masyarakat, bahkan dinilai menimbulkan semacam euphoria dimana Timnas Indonesia diperlakukan bak superstar oleh rakyat dan media. Bagi saya hal ini pun sangat membanggakan. Untuk pertama kali setelah sekian lama, rakyat Indonesia bersatu padu mendukung Timnas Indonesia atas nama Nasionalisme. Luar Biasa!

Ada analisa yang cukup menggelitik hati di acara Metro TV tadi. Disebutkan bahwa Euforia terhadap Timnas Indonesia ini terjadi karena masyarakat Indonesia sudah haus akan figure pahlawan yang bisa dijadikan role model di tengah-tengah bobroknya moral yang ditunjukkan oleh pemimpin dan elit politis saat ini. Ini memang penyakit bangsa Indonesia menurut saya. Bangsa kita selalu bertumpu pada figur, selalu mencari sosok untuk dijadikan panutan. Saat sosok tersebut melakukan kesalahan layaknya manusia, bangsa kecewa, dan pada akhirnya nasionalisme menguap begitu saja. Saat terjadi hal yang tidak sesuai harapan, sosok atau lembaga yang disalahkan.

“Salah Pak Presiden makanya saya tetap miskin, dari lahir ampe tua, ga kaya-kaya”

“Salah anggota DPRD makanya desa kami ga maju-maju”

For me, it is plain WRONG.

Dengan bertumpu pada satu sosok figur, kita menghindari tanggung jawab terhadap apa yang terjadi kepada kita maupun masyarakat sekitar kita. We relieve ourselves from being accountable for what happen to us, to our family, to our nation. And it is WRONG.

Diri kita masing-masing yang seharusnya bertanggung jawab terhadap apa yang terjadi kepada diri kita, kepada masyarakat, kepada bangsa. Individu-individu di Negara ini saling terhubung satu sama lain, membentuk komunitas yang pada akhirnya menjadi bangsa Indonesia. Apa yang terjadi di Indonesia adalah hasil dari puluhan tahun individu di Negara ini bersikap tidak perduli terhadap nilai-nilai hakiki yang dipegang oleh masyarakat yang adil dan makmur, yaitu kejujuran, integritas, dan kasih sayang yang diwujudkan dalam toleransi. WE ARE TO BLAME!

Tentu kita kecewa kalau presiden, aparat, atau politisi tidak melakukan tugasnya sebagaimana mestinya. Bahkan saya tonton di media, ada yang menulis puisi tentang Indonesia berjudul “Negara Para Bedebah”. Kita boleh marah, kecewa, teriak-teriak, but guess what? We put them there on the first place. Our VOTE (or lack of Vote for Golput’ers) put them there, in the government, in DPRD, in DPR, in Istana Negara. So WE ARE RESPONSIBLE. Jadi, Pak Adhie M. Masardi yang nulis puisi tentang “Negara Para Bedebah”, Anda 100% benar, kita semua Bedebah, termasuk juga Anda loh Pak. Udah tau tuh caleg atau capres bedebah kok ya dipilih. Atau udah tau betapa pentingnya PEMILU atau PILKADA kok malah ga peduli dan Golput, terus nanti teriak-teriak protes waktu hak-hak nya tidak dibela. Udah tau korupsi harus diberantas, eh kok masih nyogok?

Saya tidak bilang bahwa control masyarakat terhadap lembaga legislative atau eksekutif itu tidak perlu tapi kita harus sadari bahwa kita, baik langsung maupun tidak langsung, juga punya andil terhadap kekacauan yang terjadi di masyarakat. Berapa banyak dari kita yang menyaksikan korupsi namun diam saja seakan itu hal biasa? Berapa banyak dari kita yang mengeluh tentang kemiskinan tapi malas untuk kerja? Kita bertanggung jawab. That’s why we have to STOP BLAMING and START DOING SOMETHING.

Look around you, see what you can improve and then go out and do it.

YOU are the CHANGE that Indonesia Need.

If you are looking for a role model to look up to, see it in the Mirror.

It’s YOU. So Be One.

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Things I’m Grateful for in My Life

Aku bersyukur pada Allah  SWT telah diberi kesempatan hidup di dunia, terlahir Islam, rahmat hidayah saat aku akil baligh, kesempatan mempelajari Al Quran, keteladanan Nabi Muhammad SAW, kepintaran, kesehatan, fisik yg sempurna, keluarga yang mencintai ku, rizki yg halal, dan segala berkah yang telah diberikan seumur hidupku. Allah SWT telah memberiku kehidupan dengan modal yang sangat cukup untuk selamat dunia dan akhirat. Sekarang semua tergantung aku untuk memanfaatkan dengan sebaik-baiknya segala modal yang diberikan-Nya untuk dapat digunakan di jalan Allah dan mengejar ridho-Nya

Aku bersyukur atas keluarga yg sempurna, Papa, Mama, dan Adek, yang mencintaiku dengan segala cara, memenuhi kebutuhan jasmani dan rohani ku tanpa cela, memberiku kesempatan untuk belajar apapun yg aku mau, memberiku keamanan dan ketentraman, senantiasa membela & mendukung ku tanpa ragu.

Aku bersyukur atas sahabat sejati yg telah dikirimkan-Nya. Yang senantiasa menyediakan waktu untuk ku. Selalu ada untuk aku. Aku percaya sahabat sejati adalah juga jodoh yang diberikan Tuhan. Aku bersyukur aku memiliki 1 orang yg aku dapat sungguh-sungguh sebut sebagai sahabat. My best friend, you know who you are. I sincerely thank you. I will forever try to be the best friend you deserve.

Aku bersyukur untuk atap di atas kepala ku, kamar kosan yang nyaman, tempat tidur yg empuk dan selimut tebal untuk menghangatkan di malam hari apalagi saat hujan deras, segala peralatan elektronik yang lengkap, mobil perusahaan yg dipinjamkan kepadaku, buku sebagai sarana ilmu, BB untuk berkomunikasi dan alat kerja, dan rumah keluarga yang senantiasa bisa menjadi tempat aku kembali apabila aku tidak mampu mandiri.

Aku bersyukur atas masa-masa SMP ku, tercebur di sekolah anak-anak borjuis Jakarta yang menilai orang lain hanya berdasarkan materi. Pengalaman tersebut, walaupun berat kala itu, menempa ku untuk menemukan jati diri ku, bahwa aku lebih dari sekedar seberapa banyak uang yang dimiliki orang tua ku, bahwa kepintaran dan semangat untuk melakukan yang terbaik adalah modal utama untuk bisa sukses di situasi seberat apapun. Berkat pengalaman itu, aku jadi percaya diri.

Aku bersyukur, atas pengalaman kerja di Bandung yang membuat aku menyadari kalau aku masih perlu banyak belajar. Bahwa aku tidaklah sepintar yang aku kira. Bahwa menerapkan suatu system membutuhkan kerja keras dan determinasi. Membuat aku berpikir ulang tentang tujuan hidup ku. Membuat aku keluar dari zona nyaman ku sehingga aku memiliki motivasi untuk berkembang.

Aku bersyukur masih bisa memiliki mimpi, yg tidak pudar meskipun pernah gagal di masa lalu. Bersyukur atas energy positif dan motivasi untuk senantiasa berjuang agar berhasil. Bagaimanapun nasibku ke kedepan, aku yakin bahwa Menyerah Bukanlah Pilihan. Semoga Allah SWT senantiasa memberikan yang terbaik.

Last but not least.. I am grateful that I am able to write again.

What are you grateful for?

A Moment of Reflection

I just realized something about me recently..

I realize I’ve been so caught up in my everyday problems that I simply forget to stop and take a good look at my life right now. I mean..

Hey.. Life is good, actually.

I’m healthy, I have a roof over my head, a stable job (however problematic it may seems).. A loving family, a beautiful city with clean air that I get to live in, a boss who is supportive, though sometimes gave me headaches..

In fact this afternoon, I get to see a real rainbow..just outside my room. How about that! I even took a picture of it.. I looked at it and just wowed.

Here..I’ll show you.

Great isn’t it? It looks better in reality, mind my poor photo-taking technique.

Anyway, I realized that this last few months I’ve been such a complainer. An egotistical one! I didn’t even realize I have that big of an ego. My ego it seems is SO BIG that I sweat and complaints on all the little stuff. Giving tantrum to all the people around me. The people I love got the most because they are around me most of the time. I even made Mom cry. I was such an idiot.

And for what? If I stop and stare at my life in this instance. Masya Allah.. God has given me so much.. And I always wants more.. more respect, more service, more politeness, more support, more love, more sensitivity, more..more..more for my Ego. Hell, I want to live in my dream world where everything is PERFECT the way I want them to be. There’s no way that will happen.

I forgot to just Be Grateful..

If I didn’t stop to take a look outside of my room window this afternoon, I wouldn’t have notice the rainbow soar beautifully to the blue sky. I wouldn’t have notice the gorgeous silhouette of mountains behind the sprawl of neighboring rooftops. I forgot how beautiful the scenery from my room here in Bandung. I forgot..

Sunset at my window. Notice the mountain silhouette at the back?

I forgot about all the little things that are beautiful, fulfilling, inspiring, enlightening that surrounded me. If only I focus my energy on those good stuffs instead of the bad, my life would’ve gotten even better.

You know.. Life is Perfect just the way it is..

Because Allah is Perfect with His plans..

My prayer to GOD before I go to sleep tonight is for forgiveness. Forgiveness for me and for everyone I cared about and let down.. And may God open their hearts to also forgive me for my mistakes.. I pray to Him, let me be a person who never let the gleam and troubles of the world blind her from the blessings she received.. to always be grateful for all the good and the bad. To always be in His light and His Mercy.. Amen.

“Every relationship is brought into our lives to teach you and to help you grow. Change is the nature of life, and ‘what was’ must pass away so that ‘what is’ has room to make your life brand new. When you become attached to a certain way of life, a part of you dies. To live fully and to BE fully alive cultivate a mind set of loving detachment and let life live you. When you do this, you will see the beauty in the small things, the fleeting nature of all life, and feel a deep sense of appreciation for everything in your life. Celebrate this new moment – whatever is may contain!”

To change I must first wholly accept the present moment.

This moment, as it is, is perfect.

(Mastin Kip)

Happiness starts with the simple things..

This is an old post of mine.. I re-publish it as a reminder for my self and my readers to take those small steps..  little by little build happiness from doing good deeds to others, however insignificant it may seems. And also, don’t forget to say thank you to anyone who lend a helping hand or give you help when you least expect it. From my observation, many people (especially in Jakarta) are ignorant to both acts..doing good deeds and saying “thank you” for receiving one.

Let’s start a new movement in this area, starting from ourselves!  Enjoy doing those little things!! 🙂

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Sometimes..we dwell to much on the “big” things.. Like a broken heart.. a delay achievement of goals.. poor performance at work.. Those “big” things that we thought, if we get them right, our life will be perfect. We concentrate on them too much that we forgot the simple joy of doing little things in life.. good things.. Such as giving your seat on the bus to an old lady.. Smiling and saying “Hi!” to everybody at work.. Being polite and nice to people on the bus, those people that you don’t know..

Yesterday, I learned that doing those things.. (the things that people, especially in Jakarta, considered unimportant and unworthy of doing) can really made my day! It made me really ( and I do mean REALLY) happy! Growing up in Jakarta.. I learned to behave like the others.. I learned NOT to care.. to mind my own business.. You can not be nice if you want to survive.. You have to be tough! To kick and elbow your way into a bus to get a seat.. even if it means you’ll stepped on somebody else’s feet or you’ll let an elderly stand all through the trip.. Cause everyone else DOES IT! You have to learn and keep up! Yesterday, a bit of conscious triggered me.. Made me act differently.. And it felt so good!I learned that I can choose, whether or not I’ll behave like others.. I don’t give a damn if everybody’s being rude.. I don’t think it’s good. I won’t do it anymore.. And believe it or not, there are still people in Jakarta who valued it (even though you must prepare yourself for those who wouldn’t thank you for your good deeds, coz they just don’t think it was important).

You don’t always need BIG things to happen to make you happy.. Give good deeds everyday, no matter how little it is or how unimportant it may seems.. Those little things can really brighten up your day! Cheers! 🙂

-Diriku Pikiranku-

Counting the Days..

I now understand the true meaning of:

“You can’t really appreciate what you have until it’s gone”.

I immediately remembered what J.K Rowling wrote in Harry Potter and The Deadly Hallows, in the part where Harry realizes that he is about to die. It goes a bit like this:

“Slowly, very slowly, he sat up, and as he did so he felt more alive, and more aware of his own living body than ever before. Why had he never appreciated what a miracle he was, brain and nerve and bounding heart? It would all be gone..

Every second he breathed, the smell of the grass, the cool air on his face, was so precious; to think that people had years and years, time to waste, so much time it dragged, and he was clinging to each second. “

Such irony, huh? It is human nature I guess. We always take things for granted.. Only fully appreciate something when we were about to lose them. We keep forgetting that even simple thing such as our beating hearts or the air that we breathe is a blessing that we ought to be grateful for. It’s not that we don’t KNOW it. We just simply take it as NORMAL, thus we do not feel the need to be thankful for it.

It’s close to what I feel right now. On my last week at my current company (my resignation is effective next week), I realize several things:

  • As I took the daily trip to the office, I found I love it! No matter how congested the traffic is.  I love watching the palm trees pass me by, on the road sides of Pondok Indah. The beauty of living and working in South Jakarta is that it is so GREEN! They are trees everywhere you look. So different from other part of the city which only provide concrete and steel as everyday scenery.
  • As I wrote my goodbye email, I realized I have so many colleagues who were always ready to lend me a helping hand. So many that, in fact, I have to revise my thank you note 5 times before it fit in 1 page (unfortunately deleting several of the names and replace it with their group names instead.. I’m very upset about that.. 😦 )
  • As I went on my farewell trip with my team, I realize they’re such a crazy cool bunch. Even my boss!! Go figure! ;p It makes me sad because I never put the effort to get to know them a lot better, to see what beneath the veils.
  • As I shake hands with my colleagues, they said nice things about how much they appreciate my work. It makes me realize I’ve done something meaningful to them. That I have helped. It makes me try to see myself from their perspective.. That maybe I didn’t appreciate myself enough.

In a nutshell, I found that the things I usually take as ordinary are the things that I’ll miss most when I’m gone. The trip to the office, the small talks in the morning with my team over breakfast, the teasing nature of my boss and the sound of us laughing together over it, the helping nature of all my colleagues.. Everything that have accompanied me through the four years of my employment.. The very reason why I decided to join this company in the first place..

I will miss them so much..

Even so, there are no regrets. I have made a decision to move forward and pursue my learning curve. But still, this is a lesson I will try to always remember in my years to come. In the future, I will take better care at appreciating and be thankful for everything that I’ve been blessed with.. even the small and ordinary stuff. For they are the colors of my life.. Because of them my life is beautiful.  🙂

Goodbye team.. I’ll miss you dearly..

Goodbyes are not forever.

Goodbyes are not the end.

They simply mean I’ll miss you

Until we meet again!


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The BIG Decision..

I’ve waited so long for this moment..

The moment when a new door opens up for me.. leads me to a new opportunity.. Full of promises of a learning experience, of an increased responsibility, of a challenge that may well be above my current capacity. A means to trial my abilities, to exercise my potentials, to see if I got what it takes to take myself to the next level..

In a nutshell, a learning curve is finally awaits!

So here I am.. just a decision away from entering that new door.. the one that will lead me to that learning curve.. The opportunity finally arrive..

And I freeze.

Even after imagining for quite some time, what it would be like to finally make that final choice.. to take that first step away from this steady state.. this comfort zone that I’m in.. When the time finally come to make that decision, I found myself scared stiff. I was terrified to choose that path. Afraid of the outcomes.

What if I do not have what it takes?

What if I do not  fit with the new culture and the new environment?

What if I fail to deliver result and ended up being let go?

What if I make the wrong decision and end up in a place far worse from where I am now?

Those “what-ifs” and other negative thoughts filled my mind. Clouding my thoughts from other possibilities.. Because THERE IS another probable outcome of that decision. THERE IS another promising end of this scenario..

What if I DO have what it takes to do this?

What if I AM able to rise to the challenge and conquer it?

Then I will develop my self in the process.. I will grow intellectually and emotionally..  I will make an impact..make a meaning out of myself and my roles..  I will be several steps closer to my goal..

In light of that other possible outcome..  I wonder..  Is it worth the risk?

Of course it is!

I know i may fail this..but I can also succeed.

I can plan to succeed.

I can prepare my self, do my homework, develop my game plan, fight to succeed!

Therefore, I will not let this negativity hinder me from reaching my goal.

I am going to take that final step.

I have made my decision. May GOD guides me through the challenges that lies ahead.

I am ready.

Finding the Right Job

“It is virtually impossible to know where any given job will take you. In fact, if you meet someone who has faithfully followed a career plan, try not to get seated beside him at a dinner party. What a bore!” -Jack Welch-

I particularly like these words by Jack Welch. It’s like an AHA! moment for me.

I was confused about what I want to do with my life. My job was a bore. I had so many options of what I want to do with my life and I didn’t seem to know which one I want to focus on? All of them are nice and they all fit with my vision.

So, I had no clue. I was to busy thinking.. figuring what my next move was.. and while doing that, I ended up spending a year doing absolutely nothing! Go figure! 🙂

I wasn’t living.. just merely surviving. Up until my best friend gave me a really good advice that set me on track. He said “You think too much! Why don’t you just try them all. See how it goes. Surely one of them will lead you to what you were looking for. If you’re to busy thinking, you’ll end up not doing anything.” (Yes Fer, it’s YOU. I know how “Narsis” you are so I’ll give you the credit here, assuming you read this ;p).

And then I read another thing that Jack Welch said in his book Winning:

“How do you find the right job?

The first answer is simple: you endure the same gummy, time-consuming, up-and-down, iterative process that all working people go through. You take one job, discover what you like and don’t like about it and what you’re good and bad at, and then, in time, change jobs to get something closer to the right fit. And you do that until one day you realize—hey, I’m finally in the right job. I like what I’m doing, and I’m making the trade-offs I’m willing to make.”

AHA!!

So finally, I’ve decided, what the hell, let just give them all a try and see what happens. Let GOD lead the way. And it’s just the liberation I needed. I’m now pursuing three of my life options, all at the same time. I know that when the time comes, I’ll know which one to focus on. Or maybe, these roads I take would lead me to another option entirely different, who knows!

But at least I’m living..

No one said it better than a friend of mine. “Some people are Snipers. They know exactly what their target is and plan carefully in great detail to make the kill. But we, Yoan, are Bombers. We know the area we want to destroy then we throw bombs at them, see which one does the job. We both have generic dreams with a whole lot of alternatives to pursue it. It’s ok to try all of them, provided each alternatives lead to the same area.. the same big picture.”

I laughed when I heard it. What a creative way to put it. But he’s right! It’s ok to have generic dreams.. it’s ok to want to do everything.. Discovering your dream is a journey itself. As long as you stick to your life vision and actually doing something to reach it, you will get there!

I know I’ll get there! 🙂

PS: Thank you Frans, for the “original analogy”. I know I’m a bomber now. LOL.