Tag Archives: love

Sara Bareilles – Gravity

I heard this song a few months ago on the radio, and I didn’t know the name of the song nor the singer. So I am left with a deep longing since.. Really,  I am not exaggerating.

This song gave me the chills. I literally pause when I heard this. The beautiful voice of the singer captivate me, and the lyrics is so beautiful, simple and honest..

“Set me free, leave me be. I don’t want to fall another moment into your gravity.”

This is the lyrics that really struck a chord in me. It stuck in my head ever since. I don’t know why? I can not say that I can relate to this lyrics.. I was not in love then and I am not in love now. But I have been in love.. and this song really reminds me of what it feels like to be in love. How it is liberating and frightening at the same time. How it makes you feel strong but yet vulnerable.

This song evoke those memories and make me remember..

It makes me miss being in love..

Love really is a wonderful thing..

I hope you enjoy the song and the lyrics like I do..

With Love. Diriku Pikiranku.

Sara Bareilles – Gravity


Something always brings me back to you.

It never takes too long.

No matter what I say or do I’ll still feel you here ’til the moment I’m gone.


You hold me without touch.

You keep me without chains.

I never wanted anything so much than to drown in your love and not feel your rain.


Set me free, leave me be. I don’t want to fall another moment into your gravity.

Here I am and I stand so tall, just the way I’m supposed to be.

But you’re on to me and all over me.


You loved me ’cause I’m fragile.

When I thought that I was strong.

But you touch me for a little while and all my fragile strength is gone.


I live here on my knees as I try to make you see that you’re everything I think I need here on the ground.

But you’re neither friend nor foe though I can’t seem to let you go.

The one thing that I still know is that you’re keeping me down

You’re on to me, on to me, and all over…

Something always brings me back to you.

It never takes too long.

Euforia Tim Nasional Indonesia

Baru aja nonton acara Metro TV tentang “Nasionalisme 2×45 Menit”. Di situ ada dianalisa tentang Euforia Timnas yang terjadi di Indonesia, pasca turnamen sepakbola AFF Cup 2010. Bagi yang belum tau (red:kemane aje? :P), performa tim sepakbola Indonesia yg mengesankan di AFF Cup 2010 benar-benar membangkitkan nasionalisme bangsa dan popularitas sepakbola Indonesia di mata masyarakat, bahkan dinilai menimbulkan semacam euphoria dimana Timnas Indonesia diperlakukan bak superstar oleh rakyat dan media. Bagi saya hal ini pun sangat membanggakan. Untuk pertama kali setelah sekian lama, rakyat Indonesia bersatu padu mendukung Timnas Indonesia atas nama Nasionalisme. Luar Biasa!

Ada analisa yang cukup menggelitik hati di acara Metro TV tadi. Disebutkan bahwa Euforia terhadap Timnas Indonesia ini terjadi karena masyarakat Indonesia sudah haus akan figure pahlawan yang bisa dijadikan role model di tengah-tengah bobroknya moral yang ditunjukkan oleh pemimpin dan elit politis saat ini. Ini memang penyakit bangsa Indonesia menurut saya. Bangsa kita selalu bertumpu pada figur, selalu mencari sosok untuk dijadikan panutan. Saat sosok tersebut melakukan kesalahan layaknya manusia, bangsa kecewa, dan pada akhirnya nasionalisme menguap begitu saja. Saat terjadi hal yang tidak sesuai harapan, sosok atau lembaga yang disalahkan.

“Salah Pak Presiden makanya saya tetap miskin, dari lahir ampe tua, ga kaya-kaya”

“Salah anggota DPRD makanya desa kami ga maju-maju”

For me, it is plain WRONG.

Dengan bertumpu pada satu sosok figur, kita menghindari tanggung jawab terhadap apa yang terjadi kepada kita maupun masyarakat sekitar kita. We relieve ourselves from being accountable for what happen to us, to our family, to our nation. And it is WRONG.

Diri kita masing-masing yang seharusnya bertanggung jawab terhadap apa yang terjadi kepada diri kita, kepada masyarakat, kepada bangsa. Individu-individu di Negara ini saling terhubung satu sama lain, membentuk komunitas yang pada akhirnya menjadi bangsa Indonesia. Apa yang terjadi di Indonesia adalah hasil dari puluhan tahun individu di Negara ini bersikap tidak perduli terhadap nilai-nilai hakiki yang dipegang oleh masyarakat yang adil dan makmur, yaitu kejujuran, integritas, dan kasih sayang yang diwujudkan dalam toleransi. WE ARE TO BLAME!

Tentu kita kecewa kalau presiden, aparat, atau politisi tidak melakukan tugasnya sebagaimana mestinya. Bahkan saya tonton di media, ada yang menulis puisi tentang Indonesia berjudul “Negara Para Bedebah”. Kita boleh marah, kecewa, teriak-teriak, but guess what? We put them there on the first place. Our VOTE (or lack of Vote for Golput’ers) put them there, in the government, in DPRD, in DPR, in Istana Negara. So WE ARE RESPONSIBLE. Jadi, Pak Adhie M. Masardi yang nulis puisi tentang “Negara Para Bedebah”, Anda 100% benar, kita semua Bedebah, termasuk juga Anda loh Pak. Udah tau tuh caleg atau capres bedebah kok ya dipilih. Atau udah tau betapa pentingnya PEMILU atau PILKADA kok malah ga peduli dan Golput, terus nanti teriak-teriak protes waktu hak-hak nya tidak dibela. Udah tau korupsi harus diberantas, eh kok masih nyogok?

Saya tidak bilang bahwa control masyarakat terhadap lembaga legislative atau eksekutif itu tidak perlu tapi kita harus sadari bahwa kita, baik langsung maupun tidak langsung, juga punya andil terhadap kekacauan yang terjadi di masyarakat. Berapa banyak dari kita yang menyaksikan korupsi namun diam saja seakan itu hal biasa? Berapa banyak dari kita yang mengeluh tentang kemiskinan tapi malas untuk kerja? Kita bertanggung jawab. That’s why we have to STOP BLAMING and START DOING SOMETHING.

Look around you, see what you can improve and then go out and do it.

YOU are the CHANGE that Indonesia Need.

If you are looking for a role model to look up to, see it in the Mirror.

It’s YOU. So Be One.

I Love You Full Mom!

My Mom just visited me in Bandung.. I don’t know why, but even in my age of 20-something, I still get homesick.. especially with my mother.. I miss her a lot.. Like right now.. I miss her already.. 😦

It’s not that I am a spoiled kid.. I don’t think I am.. It’s just that, beside the constant love and affection, there are little things that she always do that is funny and amusing, and like what Javanese people say: “Ngangenin” (making you miss somebody).

Some of the things that “Ngangenin” about my mother are..

  • She never let go of her handbag. Not ever, unless me or my brother take her place and hold on real tight to the bag. 🙂 Maybe because she once almost lost her wallet to a pick-pocket, while trying to lift my sick toddler body inside a bus. She let go of her awareness once and focus on me, and it almost cost us the money to pay for my doctor. Luckily, the wallet was return to her after she bravely stand in front of everyone on the bus and demand that whoever it is that took the wallet to return it to her because she need to get me to a doctor. I admire her boldness.. 🙂
  • When we are in a restaurant.. She loves to try food but never finish it.. She ordered a couple of things on the menu, then only took 2 to 3 spoonful and she was done. Hence, left me or my brother to finish the meal.. Since I could never stomach much of it, my brother usually fulfilled the task for us. No wonder he is so plump now.. 🙂 But, both of us still willingly do it for her, just for the sake of seeing her happy..
  • She never stop praying in the car when I was in the driver seat. D’oohh.. I guess that said a lot about what she thinks of my driving ability.. ;p But I figure at the time, she had good reason to doubt me..hehe..
  • Whenever me or my brother break a promise to her, something bad happen.. I’m serious, It’s like a curse that kept us from being naughty. Like what happened to me last weekend, I promised to be back home at 9pm, but I stayed at the mall late, and guess what happened? My car broke down.. go figure! 🙂
  • She always does a 1 to 2 hour preach of advice every time I’ve done something bad.. At the time it was frustrating..but later on it was like an anchor to me to evaluate and improve my self. I once deliberately went to tell her about my wrongdoing, just to get her to knock the sense out of me..to get me off that road permanently. But now, I would think twice before I do that since I’m afraid it will increase her blood pressure.. ;p
  • She loves to buy her kids things but always think twice or trice before buying herself things..and in most cases, she usually end up not buying. That’s why now, when I have my own income, I like to buy her things that she loves, even when she never ask for anything.. It’s worth it to see the glow in her eyes..

Those are some of the things that I will always miss about my mother.. No matter how old I get.. I’m sure all of you have your own version of things you miss of your mother.. Just don’t forget to show your mother how much you love her..even if you think they already know. 🙂

A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie. ~Tenneva Jordan

I Love You Full Mom! 🙂

Go on and Fly Boy..

When I hear this lyric..it just clicks with what I’m feeling right now..with you..

So..this song is for you..

If you need some time, I don’t mind. I don’t hold on to the tail of your kite..

Go on and Fly, Boy..

Sleeps with Butterflies – Tori Amos


Take you away again

Are you flying

Above where we live

Then I look up a glare in my eyes

Are you having regrets about last night

I’m not but I like rivers that rush in

So then I dove in

Is there trouble ahead

For you the acrobat

I won’t push you unless you have a net

You say the word

You know I will find you

Or if you need some time

I don’t mind

I don’t hold on

To the tail of your kite

I’m not like the girls that you’ve known

But I believe I’m worth coming home to

Kiss away night

This girl only sleeps with butterflies

With butterflies

So go on and fly then boy


Look good from on the ground

I fear with pins and needles around

We may fall then stumble

Upon a carousel

It could take us anywhere

I’m not like the girls that you’ve known

But I believe I’m worth coming home to

Kiss away night

This girl only sleeps with butterflies

With butterflies

With butterflies

So go on and fly boy

At Least I Have Tried..

I don’t know why, but I always get the urge to write when I’m sad.. Especially when heartbroken.. It seems to me writing could be an output to overflowing of emotions, usually sadness.. That way I could reach that state of emotional balance again..to be whole again..not crumbling inside like this. Oh well then, let me just take advantage of it while it last..


……… I’m just lost for words right now.


Let’s just say.. I fell for someone..a good friend of mine.. I gave it a go.. and I failed.

It’s hard.. cause for me to be able to open myself to love again is not easy, let alone to try and do something about it. And.. Like after every failure, my subconscious mind started to analyze and question things..

Mind:Why are u always fall for you friend..why not somebody new, who you don’t have history with..it will be a lot more easier to leave behind when it’s not working, right?

Heart: “Cause I can’t fall for a stranger.. I need to know him well for sometime before I trust him..let alone love him.. I just can’t do that.. He has to be my friend first, before anything else..”

Mind: “You know damn well that he’s not that into you and thinks of you only as his friend, so why continue anyway? You could prevent something like this from happening, right?

Heart: “I can not want something and not do anything about it. However impossible it may seems, I rather try and fail, than be at the agony of not knowing, just thinking ‘what ifs’. If I could do it all over again, I would do the same. That’s just the way I am.. I guess..”

And with that, my mind rest.. I hope.. ;p My stubborn heart always came up with answers that are sometimes illogical, but will never alter.. because they represent ME. As foolish as I maybe..

Source: www.deviantart.com/deviation/

So.. now, what’s left to do is just to move on..

I’m going to look forward, and not regretting yesterday..  🙂

Thus, the menus for this beautiful Monday are:

  • Work like Hell at the office. Like this quote I found this morning on Tweeter: “Love conquers all, but if love doesn’t do it, try hard work.” –Anonymous
  • Work out the rest of my energy at the gym.. Just wear them off on treadmill.. :p
  • All the while, listening to sad love songs on my Winamp… Jennifer Paige – Beautiful, Bellefire – Can’t Cry Hard Enough, Lionel Ritchie – Can’t Get Over You, Colbie Caillat – I Never Told You. Jennifer Love Hewitt – Couldn’t Find Another Man… Huhuhuhuhuhu… Hiks..Hiks..

Tetap semangat Yoan!! Remember.. No Regrets! Jiaiyoooo!! Go..Go..Go…

Have a Good Monday Morning everyone! 🙂

I Am Afraid..

Love is Scary..

Love make you stop and wonder..

“Is this really ‘it’? or is it just another silly feelings?”

“Am I being brave by taking chances..or just plain stupid..?”

“Do I really love him..or just love my image of him..of us..?”

It’s very hard to be logical when your heart beat faster with each remembrance..When his face pops out in your head on every quiet moments.. When you feel quite content with longing..while you can’t even describe or define what is it about him that makes you feel this way?

Should I runaway and hide.. or should I stay and fight for it?

How I wish to have an accurate formula for this problem and not relying solely on gut feeling.. I am not a ‘player’ at all.. I have test the water and it’s not very nice.. I may have zero chance in this but I want to try anyway..

I have run almost my whole life.. I wonder what will happen if I go against the odds this time? I know I want to do it.. I want to take my chances this time.. Be brave enough this time..

Hey You.. If you’re reading this..

I’m building my courage.. Though I’m still scared and don’t know If I ever going to pull it off in the end..

I’m planning to say.. I love you.. Please be nice if you don’t feel the same..

“To be brave is to love someone unconditionally, without expecting anything in return. To just give. That takes courage, because we don’t want to fall on our faces or leave ourselves open to hurt.” -Veronica-

Pictures from: blaine.org


It’s been a long time since a was in love… A very loooooooong time..

Since then.. I’ve seen so many of my friends fall in love.. Watched dozens of romantic movies about everlasting love.. Dreamed always for myself to find that one true love, not to mention the endless search for my soul mate amongst the single and available guys around.

But still.. I haven’t found it. It’s not that easy I guess. Well..I don’t mind. I’m sure it’ll worth the wait.

I do miss the feeling though.. I miss being in love..

Smiling all the time.. Feeling like the world is the most beautiful place and thus thankful to be alive.. It’s like nothing can make me sad… like walking on air.. 🙂

It’s a beautiful feeling.. I want to feel it again..

image from www.healing-elements.co.uk